Donald where's yer bawbag

ScottishCorpus popped up in the news over the last couple of days to great fanfare. According to it's creators, the site "captures the country's rich linguistic, historical and cultural background", offering "the most detailed analysis yet of the linguistic differences that exist in Scotland". Well, I've got a word for them: baws!

After reading the site also contained clips of Scottish authors reading the words, I unplugged my headphones, turned up my speakers and headed over to immerse myself (and the rest of the office) in some good old Scottish profanity. Unfortunately, unlike Buffy's swearing keyboard, you can't just go there and start clicking curses. Oh no. They had to go and make it all serious and academic. When will these people realise that is NOT what teh internets is for? More importantly, it's also the sites downfall - their po-faced attitude has led to them missing the real diversity of contemporary Scottish language; i.e. it's fantastic insults & curses. For a start, there is none of the following:

• bawbag
• fannybaws
• rocket (at least not as an insult)
• banjo/banjoed
• jakey

What a crock. I'm going to have to make my own now, which will obviously never happen. The Scottish Corpus can ram it.
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